Tradition.......TRADITION!!!!!

I have lived long enough to learn that there are basically two undeniable, irrefutable, unchanging facts of life. 

The first is that the only thing in life that doesn't change is the fact that things are gonna change.

The second is that we all--and i mean every one of us--have one thing in common.  We all have the weirdest, most dysfunctional family on earth.

Let me show you why mine is more weird and dysfunctional than the resta y'alls.

Exhibit A.

My little brother.  Ok, he is not very little.  At 40 years of age, he can still bear hug a washing machine, pick it up out of the bed of a pickup and SET it on the ground.  I think it is fair to say that on our best days, most of us would be lucky to PUSH a washing machine out of the pickup.

Boo is special.  Jerry's kids kind of special. 

The man has FIVE, count 'em FIVE Jack Russell Terriers.  One of them is named Jihad.  Tell ya anything?

He is one of those people that has always grabbed life by the um....tail and given it a good swing.  He has been a surfer dude, an underwater welder, whatever they call those guys that climb the radio towers to fix things, worked clean up in New Orleans during flooding from Katrina, he has done three tours in Iraq (2 military, 1 civi,) one in Afghanistan, and one in Somalia. 

He has always been a hard working, hard playing man, and, as he admitted openly and freely on a news segment interview when asked why he climbed radio towers, "I'm just not right in the head."  He has no filters whatsoever, so you always know just where you stand with him.  And he has one of the biggest hearts you will ever find.

He is one of the funniest, sharpest witted people i have ever met.  I cannot imagine him driving home saying "I should have said....."  Stuff just comes right off the top of his head and out his mouth.  He is like a real life cartoon character.   My children adore him.  Heck, i adore him, i just have to warn the kids that if they ever repeat anything, and i mean ANYTHING their Uncle Boo says, they will be grounded for life. 

When Ellie May was a little bitty thing, maybe 18 months old, i was trying to take a picture of Ellie and Boo, when he convinced her to put her little finger in her little nose.  She squealed with laughter, and a family tradition was born.  Since that time, the first picture, no matter what i do, always involves fingers in noses.  I used to protest and scold and harrumph, but it did no good, the more i got upset the more they laughed.  In time i gave up and learned to embrace the tradition.  It is not something i am proud of, mind you, but i can respect the value of stupid, harmless traditions.  I guess.

In my old age, i have learned to look for the positive in unpleasant or embarrassing situations.  In this case, I am pleased to say that the silver lining is that neither of my children will be able to get a date until they are at least 25, as i am going to produce THIS picture every time they bring home a prospective suitor or girlfriend.  I am so proud.  What mother wouldn't be??

Exhibit B.

The family scuttlebutt the last couple of years is the mausoleum, or as Ellie calls it, the sarcophagus, that one of Paul's brothers has erected in honor of his life's achievements.  Just in case one of us forgot some of it. 

Most of my dad's people are buried in a beautiful little country cemetery here in east Texas, complete with the little white church across the road.  It is a peaceful, lovely place.  Quaint.  Unassuming.  Simple.

If i may be so bold as to quote Addie from the book "Paper Moon," this sarcophagus is "about as inconspicuous as a turd in a punch bowl."  No disrespect intended.  Really.

Anyway, Boo hadn't seen it yet, so i made him promise not to go out to the cemetery until i could go with him.  I couldn't wait to see and hear the first reaction.  And let me tell ya, it was a doozy.  I was not disappointed.  Except in myself.  Don't know what i was thinking.  Shudda made the kids sit in the car.  This is a family story, so i am not going to be able to share the first words out of his mouth with you, but will happily tell it upon request.  How about i just show you a picture....

Exhibit C.

Turns out there are things about my brother that i didn't know.  Seems he loves to shop in truck stops.  Naturally, we all had to indulge him and spend a delightful half hour perusing the offerings of one of the more upscale truck stops i have ever been to....the restaurant was a Lenny's.

Here we find Paul Adeen sporting his Dan'l Boone meets Minnie Pearl look...

...and this one, well, it just speaks for itself, doesn't it?

Exhibit D.

There is another brother.  He never attends these functions.  Apparently we embarrass him.  I just cannot imagine why.

So whaddaya think...is yours as wild as mine?